Just a Stream Of Thoughts

Good Morning All.

Today, I truly have no intention of writing nything i particular. I'm writing for the sake of writing. As the experiment of this blog continues to unfold. I find that instead of sitting down and having more and more things to write, as more and more people start to read, I'm constantly worried about losing readership by writing worse and worse. I think for the past weke or so, I've been writing wrose thanks to this fear. So fuck all that.

Here's my stream of thoughts: Right now I'm drinkgin coffee, excited about my wife's website. It took me about 2 hours to get a fucking email subscription bar to center on the home page, but besides that, It looks pretty great and wasn't to much of a bother. I also am wondering if My youtube channel will work out. We've been having some problems getting more subscribers, and nobody seems to be watching our stuff on twitch, either. However we did just change the channel completely, so hopefully it'll grow more over the next week or so. If anyone out there has some reccommendations on how to make it blow up a little faster, that would be appreciated.

I started making real money with this blog. Not like REAL real money, but like take my wife out to dinner once a month money. That's pretty cool for something I've been working on for about an hour a day for a month. hopefully If i keep up the writing it'll get a little better over time. Hopefully I don't continue to write trite bullshit and make nobody read it anymore. Hopefully My wife doesn't mind me musing about our fighting on an open internet forum. WE'll see. All I know is that right now: I'm happier than I've been in a very, very long time. I have a wife that loves me, a daughter thats about a billion times smarter than my wife or myself, and I'm doing some things that I really am enjoying every day. It's great. I'm hoping that with each passing day each part of what I'm doing gets better, and gets closer to letting us live the life we want to. I think that's my real goal here.

I want to see these little bullshit endeavors grow. I want them to look more professional, more real, and more legitimate every day until they really give us what we're looking for: real , true financial security. real true lifestyle design A La Tim Ferris. Spend 6 months in Buenos Aires because why the fuck not freedom. Drive cross country and write about it on my blog freedom. Wake up at noon on a Tuesday Freedom. Its there. I can smell it.

But what's the secret sauce to get there? I've been working on all of these endeavors from sun up to sundown, and they're still not quite as professional, or quite as cleaned up as I would like them to be. I've actually found myself working through friends coming over, through conversations with my wife, through bath time and nap time and storytime with Sophia. It might be too much. It might not be enough. It might be exactly what you need to get things like this off the ground. I'm not sure. Everyone hides their secret sauce, or their secret sauce is "hard work" and  that's the one I'm going for.

I've had a few places show interest in me for jobs. I'm not sure if I want to take them. I'm not sure if a job in the financial field is what I need right now. I'm not sure that another full time worker in this house is what will make it better. I take that back. I'm no sure that me sitting at a desk being unavailable for Sophia is what this household needs. I'm not sure that I'm more useful to my family making a paycheck when I can make that money somewhere else AND be more available. That is what I want to say. I'm not sure its healthy for us, for me, or for anyone else involved. I just don't know.

I'm wondering what the next month or so will look like. I can take a job, start working, and go back to doing what I was doing before. This next job, armed with the experiences of the ones before, I'm sure will be one I will enjoy more, because I won't make those same mistakes again. I'm sure that I'll be paid well. I'm sure that I'll do well at the job, and excel for my bosses and be eligible for raises and promotions and whatever else. I enjoy succeeding. I enjoy working hard. I enjoy doing well on a team, and leading the team to victory. These are things I enjoy. I also enjoy my time. I also enjoy My space. I also enjoy working for myself, and finding my own way. Its always been my dream to work on my own. Maybe at the end of this month I've found that. Maybe at the end of this month I haven't and I'm back to work. I don't know.

I just noticed that my timer never started. I just noticed that I've written quite a lot already, and its scary. That means you all need to read it, because its important. That means that Its not bullshit, like the past week has been. I hope that you enjoy this more than whatever I've been writing before. Its hard to guage what will read well and what won't. That is something I've learned so far. I figured that My Edward Snowden Post would be hailed as complete bullshit, get me double-tracked by the NSA, and would be my least popular post. Instead its gotten more views than all of my other posts COMBINED. Its by far my post popular writing thus far. The close second is what Stef and I write about our business endeavors. None of which I was planning on putting on this blog. But that's what's working from a popularity standpoint.

I can write more politics. I love politics almost as much as I hate them, if that makes any sense. However, I feel as though there aren't any columnists that attack the issues that come forth from a more logical standpoint. From a "why legislate?" standpoint. From a more truly conservative, but socially liberal, "government for the people" standpoint To explain my exact point of view on politics and how to write on it would take me another 5 pages, so maybe that's what I'll write about tomorrow.

Until then, stay tuned to watch me fall flat on my face in any number of directions. Or Succeed. We'll see.